Lots and lots of excitement this week. Super good stuff.

Not really, I just wanted to build you up with false hope and expectations.

- Jenny's cross country craziness ends when she and Moira finally make it to L.A. Now she'll just be crazy in California again. Carmen and Shane are puppy sitting an adorable little puppy. Jenny basically rubs the puppy all over her body and then declares she's "a little bit allergic" to dogs. Carmen says it will be fine since the dog is "kind of hairless" and Moira blurts some bullshit about people being allergic to dog saliva and not hair. I can't stand people who talk shit when they don't know what they're talking about, even if it's just a bad tv character. So, most people are allergic to the dander that dogs produce. That's why my girlfriend, who is allergic to just about everything under the sun, can love our little poodle to death and never have any hint of an allergic reaction. Poodles produce little to no dander. Now whether the little puppy sitting dog produces a lot of dander I don't know, but he does pee on Jenny so he's now like my second favorite dog ever.

To end the weirdness of the puppy sitting/allergy/pee on Jenny situation Carmen offers to help Shane and Jenny get their bags out of the massive truck of epic butchness The Truck of Epic Butchness. Moira says oh no, "you girls relax and let us butches (meaning she and Shane) unload the truck." Excuse the fuck out of me? Carmen thinks the comment is kind of funny but she loses her sense of humor quick enough when she figures out that Moira is moving in. Jenny sort of kind of forgot to ask or even mention Moira moving in.

Later the entire group goes out to a super fancy restaurant for a welcome back dinner for Jenny. Not just because she's finally back from visiting her family but because after the craziness that included slicing herself up last season she spent some serious time in the mental ward. Her return to L.A. coincides with having been out of the hospital for five months. So it's a "welcome back to town, we know you're crazy but please don't go that crazy again" dinner. There is talk at the dinner of a manuscript Jenny has submitted to an editor in New York. The editor's daughter was Jenny's roommate in the hospital. When asked if she's read Jenny's work Moira says well no see, I'm a computer technician. Apparently computer people are illiterate in every other area. I didn't get that memo. I'd cut Moira some slack because she was really uncomfortable in the fancy restaurant (and totally inappropriately dressed) but she was really just a brat. Everyone at dinner tried to be nice to her but her uncomfortableness or weirdness precluded her from seeing that. Instead she decided that everyone is evil and told a story about how female lobsters don't try to escape from a lobster pot because they're all too busy holding the other females down. Male lobsters form a chain to help each other escape, female lobsters hold each other down to die. She's very subtle with her metaphors. Shortly after the lobster story she just left. She then went off to some deserted spot and cried all by her lonesome. Well of course she had the truck of epic butchness The Truck of Epic Butchness to keep her company. After her departure the table descended into a discussion about butch identity, butch/femme role playing, being comfortable in one's own skin, etc. No one seems to really understand Moira though at least Bette seems to acknowledge that Moira's environment back home is quite different than their own and that must play some part in her being so different from them.

But the most important part of the dinner is the fact that Bette orders lobster that comes with lemon froth. What the fuck is lemon froth? Also, much to Tina's dismay, Bette wants to pay for everyone's expensive ass dinner but alas her card is declined. Obviously American Express needs to start advertising it's no credit limit nonsense to the formerly well-employed head lesbian in charge demographic.

- Tina and Bette did in fact hire Angus (the leader of Angelica's musical playgroup) to be Angelica's manny (because god knows we can't just say nanny). Kit digs Angus. She really digs him. Apparently skinny, slightly scruffy white boys who are good with kids are just the flavor that Kit craves. I thought menopause made people lose their sex drive. Apparently not Kit cause she looked at Angus like she wanted to break him in two, in a good way. This was Kit's only real purpose in this episode, well this and looking pissed at Billie Blaikie since he's basically changing everything about The Planet from the menu to the table arrangements and the thermostat settings. The thing is though, Kit is still the boss right? Right. So if she's so pissed at him all the time she should really just fire him or get over it.

Bette is still spending money like she has a J.O.B which she so totally does not. She's even lost her stipend for a very political art exhibition because the NEA pulled the funding out. Tina, rightfully, distresses about the money situation. Bette can't believe that Tina is spewing "bourgeois anxiety" about money. Yes, she really said bourgeois anxiety. I'm thinking no one in the family having any income but having a baby makes the anxiety pretty fucking realistic and practical.

Tina's bourgeois anxiety causes her to be open to a job offer from Helena at her newly acquired film studio. Bette is not pleased about the job offer and tries to be all territorial. Tina points out that somebody in the family has got to make money and it's not really up to Bette whether or not Tina takes a job. Bette is hurt and sad and decides to sell some very valuable but very important to her pieces of art. She doesn't mention this to Tina and Tina accepts Helena's job offer. Yay for communication!

- Alice is still drinking the crazy Kool-Aid (season 3 question, is Alice the new Jenny?). Her boss at the radio station notes that while the mentions of Dana in her most recent show dropped from 43 to 27 the craziness in her show has to stop now. The boss says she'd be well within her right to fire Alice but she wants to give her one more shot. The shot is dependent upon not mentioning Dana on the air again.

Pre-Jenny dinner, Shane and Carmen pick Alice up at her apartment. Carmen is a little freaked by the cardboard cutout of Dana but Shane tells her that it used to be much worse, what with the shrine and all. At the dinner Alice stalks Dana in the bathroom but says she won't do anything crazy, she just wants to talk. She wants to know that Dana is happy. Dana says she is, for the most part. What she doesn't mention is that her doctor is a little concerned about the lump in her breast that Lara (or is it Laura?) found and that she's having a biopsy the next day. Alice says she she's trying really, really hard to get over Dana and maybe they can be friends again one day. This all sounds remarkable sane and Dana smiles and says she hopes they can be friends too because she misses Alice. A sane person will realize that she's saying she misses having Alice as a friend. Alice, not being sane, imagines it's an opportunity and thus says "Then come back to me."

- Shane is probably going to setup a booth in a skater boi shop. The owner wants Shane to be the hair stylists to all his cool little skater punks and eventually develop a line of hair products. This part seems like it was just kind of thrown together but previews for next week have the same guy (I think) talking to Moira about being trans and I'm guessing that starts the progress of Moira becoming Max. So not only is it totally random and obscure that Shane is going to setup a hair salon station in a skater shop but also the owner is a trans guy who's going to bond with Moira over her transition to Max? No, that can't be right can it? Fuck I'm old.